Here’s an exact map of my G-spot, precise instructions for stimulating it, and an analysis of the much-debated topic: “Is the G-spot a UFO-type myth?” Human beings can fly spaceships to the end of the Universe, communicate with dead people, walk on water and part the Red Sea, but their scientists have not yet been able to determine if the female ejaculate from G-spot stimulation is liquid or urine. . You are about to find the answer to this burning question.
As the world writhes over the newly elected Hamas government and the question of whether or not Iran should be allowed to build nuclear bombs, let us worry about more practical matters. In June 2005, Iran’s hard-line new president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the son of a blacksmith, defeated former Eeranian president Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani in a runoff election. Many in the Muslim world wonder what George Bush Jr. is doing acting like the mother of President Ahmadinejad. Others wonder how a 6’4″ man who blew up the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and barely missed the White House managed to hide among the Munchkins for 5 years evading capture by the most sophisticated military in the history of life on on Earth, with the ability to photograph your G-spot from mystical satellites orbiting 10,000 miles above you.And yet the debate continues as to whether female ejaculate is urine or G-spot fluid. G-spot liquid is clear and sweet. It’s Tropicana’s newest patent-pending flavor.
The G-spot is named after the famous German gynecologist Ernest Grafenberg. Joseph Lieberman is named after Joseph in the Holy Bible. Joseph’s brothers dug a hole in the ground and left him there for him to die. Joseph escaped and later became the Prince of Egypt. He was an excellent dream interpreter and pyramid renovator. When the land of Israel suffered from a drought, Joseph’s 12 brothers traveled to Egypt in search of food. They approached José but no one recognized him. They said to Joseph: Pharaoh, please give us some sustenance so that we can eat. Joseph replied, “You are not worthy of the Graffenburg fluid.”
Here is the map of my G-spot. I am lying on my back. You take your middle finger and insert it into the exact center of my vagina. Continue up the top wall for about 2″. At this point your finger will descend into a valley. Continue on and you will come out of the valley. Now you know the valley is there. Now go back to the center of the valley. The exact center of the valley is the G-spot. Now you need to know what to do with it.
This part is quite important. My girlfriend Lindsay had an unfortunate experience. Her boyfriend had found this website in her mailbox where he learned how to stimulate the G-spot. He curved his index finger up and stroked Lindsay’s G-spot hard. Two blood transfusions later at Good Samaritan Hospital, Lindsay came out of her coma. If you are not interested in 4 years of embarrassing litigation, when you insert your index finger into your girlfriend’s vagina, instead of bending your middle finger up, arch it back and use the bottom pad of your middle finger to gently caress the point G for his girlfriend. in circular motions, or back and forth, or up and down, as you lick her clitoris, alternating between touching her rapidly until she experiences her first simultaneous vaginal, clitoral, and G-spot orgasm. You’ll know you’ve hit the nail on the head when the walls of her vagina squeeze your fingers, she ejaculates, and then takes you to meet her parents.
The ideal length for the male penis is 9 inches and the girth of the penis is also important. A rock-hard penis with a titanic penis length and a titanic penis girth with great penis stamina are the key to the Kingdom on Earth and in Heaven. According to Dr. Sigmund Freud, the father of psychiatry, men have a subliminal sexual thought every three seconds. If you add your conscious sexual thoughts, that brings it down to every two seconds. If men now start thinking about the right way to please a woman, that should cut it down to every second and then they won’t have time to worry about silly caricatures. It should be illegal for a man to run for office, given his complete obsession with sex. Men love cat fights and if every country was run by a woman and countries started fighting, men would be thinking about sex constantly and would never have time for war. This is the solution for eternal World Peace in case the Messiah is delayed on a more worthy planet.
The male penis usually curves up. God created it that way to stimulate a woman’s G-spot during intercourse. Unfortunately, in some men the penis curves downward. This can be corrected with a minor surgical procedure followed by 6 months of physical therapy. The question arises, given human biology, why do women prefer doggy style? During doggy style, the normal male penis stimulates the back wall instead of the front wall. The answer is that in doggy style the man’s penis is simulating the arched middle finger. It all depends on your location. This is Einstein’s theory of relativity. Whether you are a terrorist or a hero depends on which side you are on. Are you the attacker or the attacked? Good luck, and may the force be with you, Luke Skywalker.