Mother’s Day has taken on new meaning for me in recent years. All my life it used to be just a fun, jovial, “light” time to pamper my mom. Then I became a mom and it became a day for my mom and I to bask in the glow of attention…if only for a nice dinner with our family. Now, it has much more depth and meaning in my heart.
It was Mother’s Day weekend two years ago when we were told that my mother’s breast cancer had spread throughout her body. My life changed forever in that moment. My mom was my dearest best friend, my personal angel, my hero, and my biggest fan. I felt like a part of me died that spring. It was a crushing blow to all of us. But, through the darkness, something unexpected emerged: a larger part of me began to live fully.
I began to pay attention to things that I had previously taken for granted. I began to look for the smallest of blessings and miracles that God had put in my way each day. I found beauty and love in places I had overlooked for years. I cherished every moment I was able to spend with mom (as I should have all along!). I started doing the same thing with my husband, my kids, my dad, and all the other precious people I love.
I realized like never before how incredibly hurt and lucky I am. My mom is dying, and the way she and I went through that journey together was really a gift in itself. With the bad, there is always the good… sometimes you just have to look closer. God is very good.
I miss my mom’s physical presence more than I ever thought I could miss anyone or anything. I feel like my heart and soul have deep and painful wounds, a gaping hole where my life with mom used to be.
Thank goodness, time and faith have literally smoothed the edges of that hole. I have carefully and intentionally filled the rest of my heart with gratitude, appreciation, and joy. I feel my mother’s beautiful, warm and loving smile as I take the time to nurture and heal.
In this Mother’s Day ‘season’, of course, my thoughts stray to my mom even more than usual. I found that my emotions can be all over the place in the weeks leading up to the day. Yes, there is sadness. But there is also an overwhelming gratitude. My mom didn’t leave behind a fortune of jewelry, money, or material things. She left me a much more valuable legacy.
My mom taught me everything I needed to know about being a great mom and an exceptional woman, all through her example. She taught me to choose happiness, even when it’s not easy. She taught me how to love unconditionally and how to fully accept people, without judging. She taught me how to have faith and trust in God no matter what. She taught me to do the right thing, no matter if anyone would notice.
She taught me to be kind, patient and kind. She showed me over and over again how just being really kind and honest makes other people feel really good. She showed me how to create a satisfying, meaningful, joyful, loving and rich life by doing little things that make a big difference.
This is my mom’s legacy.
When I think of Mother’s Day, I don’t care about material things like jewelry or store-bought cards and gifts. I don’t need to be pampered or brought wine and dinner. In fact, now I know why mom always said that too!
What I want most is to truly enjoy my family and feel every ounce of gratitude I have for their presence in my life. The most precious gifts are heartfelt words, homemade gifts, and acts of appreciation and love.
Sure, if you really want me to, I’ll let you drag me to a nice restaurant too! And if I really have to, I’ll even let you give me a massage as a gift… but only to make you happy! (But I don’t want it on Mother’s Day. I want my family on Mother’s Day.)
I would like to have a few quiet moments to ‘be’ with my mom, to reflect on the meaning of my own role as a mother and the legacy I am creating, and to express my gratitude to all the other amazing women who care for me. life.
Of course, I would love for my family to take care of the meals and clean up on Mother’s Day, but only then will I have even more time to relax and enjoy them! I just want to “play” with my family ~ combine my favorite things to do, like something ‘outdoors’, with my favorite people, minus all the work. That’s MY kind of math!
Can you imagine how much more fun motherhood would be if we didn’t have all those daily household duties… and we could just kick back and enjoy the people we love the most? That’s what I’d like to try a little on Mother’s Day…and maybe a few other days throughout the year would be nice!
Motherhood is the most difficult and challenging thing I have ever done. But God rewards me with deep joy, pure and intense emotion, an infinite depth of love, and some incredibly funny moments! I am truly blessed to be a mom!
Happy Mother’s Day!