“I would say that anyone who acts without paying attention to what they are doing is wasting their life. I would dare to say that life is denied by inattention, whether it is cleaning windows or trying to write a masterpiece.” Nadia Boulanger *
Have you ever heard “Kiss me a lot”? Surely you have heard it: it is one of the most famous songs in the world and, apparently, the most recorded of all time. And of course you know the words of the chorus: “Kiss me, kiss me a lot, as if it were the last time tonight…” and consequently the feeling of sensuality and passion that they suggest: indeed, how would you make love with someone who loves you? like? , if you know it could be the last time?
An interesting aspect of this song -which in turn is less well known- is that both the text and the music were written in 1940 by Consuelo Velásquez, a Mexican girl who was not even 16 years old at the time and who -according to her statements- was not even had kissed another man… Just to say how powerful art and imagination can be…
By the way, I think it’s worth discussing a little about this. Yes, we all agree that when we know that a certain experience – for whatever reason – is rare, limited or unique, it suddenly becomes something precious that deserves our full attention and that we try to enjoy as intensely as possible. .
And this happens even if it is something apparently very trivial: if you got stuck in plaster due to a car accident, how much do you miss those beautiful moments when you could go for a walk? And if, after months locked up at home and a difficult period of rehabilitation, you are able to take a little walk around the neighborhood again, wouldn’t it be great to get back on your feet? How much would you enjoy the experience? How wonderful would you find the city? With how much pleasure would you look at any detail?
This is all due, of course, to a simple psychological principle whereby our minds tend not to place much value on what is at hand, to actually treat it as some kind of “entitlement,” and to place more value on what is not. we have. you don’t have. Therefore, we often need a loss, or the awareness of the possibility of a loss, in order to understand how valuable everything we consider “normal” is.
In fact, in our affluent society, we live in a true paradox: we have more and more goods and experiences, but considering them ordinary and normal, they do not offer us any joy.
Just two of many possible examples:
– When I was a child, they ate strawberries and cherries in May, grapes in September, oranges in December, etc., and every time Dad brought fresh fruit home, it was a source of joy for the whole family. I still remember how impatiently I waited for May to arrive, just to take the first bite of strawberry. Now I can go to the supermarket and I can eat any fruit at any time of the year. Yes, very comfortable, but… where is happiness?
– Today, wherever we go we are surrounded by music: obviously in theaters, clubs and bars, but also in shops, on the subway, on the street, at home… there is always a radio, a television, a computer of music… .and if there isn’t, we have iPods and headphones. It is almost impossible for us to conceive of a world without music. And yet… not more than a hundred years ago, it was so. The world was silent. Can you imagine this? If you wanted to listen to music, you had to find someone to play it. If you lived in a small town you could spend months or years without listening to any song, except for some popular songs or religious music on Sundays at church. Can you imagine the fantastic effect that simply listening to a symphony or an opera would have on someone? What an incredible and unique experience, plus you knew that everything you hear would be lost forever, because it couldn’t be fixed and would continue to exist only in your memory? With how much attention and concentration would you listen to each note? (I can think, in fact, that Wagner received the sheet music for Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony when he was 20 years old and finally managed to listen to it only when he was 40…)
The interesting thing about all this discussion is that what is changing is not the experience itself (it does not matter if we talk about sex, music, food, etc.), but only our perception; then it means that to live a fantastic experience, full of joy and passion, you don’t need a specific experience, but only a simple change in our perception: that is, paying all our attention to the present moment!
I know we live in a society where we have everything, the phone is always ringing, millions of thousands of more or less important daily tasks struggle to get our attention, advertising screams “Look at me” and our minds are always occupied with “something”. somewhere else”, we feel that happiness is always “somewhere else”, with the result that we are constantly in a state of apathy and boredom.
The mobile phone is a perfect example to illustrate that constant distraction of attention, to caress a possible “other” more than the current situation: how many times has it happened to you to go out with friends, and then in the group there was always someone talking by cell phone with “another person”?
Someone wrote that heaven is here and now and if we do not have this impression it is because we are never really here and now, and only when circumstances demand it of us can we realize how precious each thing is, each moment that we live and that we neglect. for our lack of attention.
I have written elsewhere that when we focus our attention on something we empower it, and when we offer our attention to someone we raise their energy levels (actually any magical ritual is just a way of focusing attention) and then, as attention is what raises and directs energy is the great power of the universe, on which our perceived reality ultimately depends.
So the next time you make love, eat something, play with your kid, talk to someone, watch something, walk in the woods, or just… “stay,” why not try participating “like it’s the night tonight?” last see”?
If we can do this, it means we’ve taken another step, a big one, this time, in understanding magic.
All the best
Bruno
Note: Nadia Boulanger, although little known by the general public, is undoubtedly one of the most extraordinary women of the last century. For those who want to know more: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nadia_Boulanger